Friday Five: McRap, Carlin, Mars, Pleasantville, Ben’s life • Long Beach Post


Joe Woody’s, McDonald’s Drive-thru Rap

I need a double cheeseburger, hold the lettuce.  Don’t be frontin son; no seeds on the bun.  We be up in this drive thru; order for two.  I got a craving for a number 9; like my shoe.  We need some chicken up in here; in the shizzle, for rizzle my mizzle; extra salt on the frizzle.  Dr. Pepper my brother; another for your mother.  Double, double super size; and don’t forget the fries!  Crispy!

Watch the epic video at this week’s 5:


Seven Dirty Words

George Carlin, the influential comedian whose routines used profanity, scatology and absurdity to point out the silliness and hypocrisy of human life, died this week. He was 71.

Carlin was often quoted, his best lines traded like baseball cards. “Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?” began one famous routine. Then there were the non-sequiturs: “The bigger they are, the worse they smell,” he observed. He filled three best-selling books, several record albums and countless television appearances with his material.

He appreciated the impact his words made on fans.

But he was probably best known for a routine that began, “I was thinking about the curse words and the swear words, the cuss words and the words that you can’t say.” It was a monologue, known as “Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television,” that got Carlin arrested and eventually led to the Supreme Court.

The “Seven Dirty Words” bit, which was initially recorded for 1972’s “Class Clown” album, prompted a landmark indecency case after New York’s WBAI-FM radio aired it in1973.

The case was appealed to the U.S. Supreme Court, where the justices ruled 5-4 that the sketch was “indecent but not obscene,” giving the FCC broad leeway to determine what constituted indecency on the airwaves.

See the video at this week’s 4:


Mars’ past is the Earth’s future!??

Why is Mars two-faced? Scientists say fresh evidence supports the theory that a monster impact punched the red planet, leaving behind perhaps the largest gash on any heavenly body in the solar system.
Today, the Martian surface has a split personality. The southern hemisphere of Mars is pockmarked and filled with ancient rugged highlands. By contrast, the northern hemisphere is smoother and covered by low-lying plains.

Three papers in Thursday’s journal Nature provide the most convincing evidence yet that an outside force was responsible.

According to their calculations, a 1,000-mile-wide object traveling at more than 13,000 miles per hour—or 24 times faster than a jetliner—would hit Mars at an angle between 30 and 60 degrees. The collision would be equal to an explosion of 75 trillion to 150 trillion megatons of TNT.

Click here to read the article at this week’s 3.



Suddenly, the economics of American suburban life are under assault as skyrocketing energy prices inflate the costs of reaching, heating and cooling homes on the outer edges of metropolitan areas.

As the realization takes hold that rising energy prices are less a momentary blip than a restructuring with lasting consequences, the high cost of fuel is threatening to slow the decades-old migration away from cities, while exacerbating the housing downturn by diminishing the appeal of larger homes set far from urban jobs.

In Atlanta, Philadelphia, San Francisco and Minneapolis, homes beyond the urban core have been falling in value faster than those within, according to analysis by Moody’s

Click here to read the article at this week’s 2.


Parody of Daily Life in Motion

A funny take-off on the recent “____ takes a picture of ___self for __years” trend.   Watch closely.

See the video at this week’s 1:

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