11:30am | You’re a cigarette smoker, which probably means that to some degree you’re an addict. And that sucks for you. In that respect, even if you’re not doing all you can do to break yourself of the habit (I don’t know you, but I’m guessing), you have my sympathy.
 
The sympathetic feelings — along with a lot of basic respect — drain right out of my body the moment I see you flicking your cigarette butt in the street. That’s a selfish and classless thing you do. It’s also criminal — as it should be — because it’s nothing less than littering.
 
I’m guessing you’re not so insipid that you don’t grasp this; it’s just that you don’t care. And I have never been able to fathom why. What is this mysterious connection between smokers and littering?
 
To be sure, not all smokers do this. I know many people who, if there’s no ashtray nearby, will crush the butt out on the sidewalk, then — after making sure it’s extinguished — tote it to the nearest trash receptacle. But you, the selfish smoker, can’t be bothered.
 
Funny thing is, I’ve never seen you drop your candy wrappers or coffee cups. Assuredly some smokers commit this sin, too — we know from surveying the nearest public sidewalk that there’s no shortage of jerks keeping such reprehensible practices alive — but you, you would never think of doing that.
 
What you don’t get, won’t get, refuse to get is that you’re doing exactly the same thing. Actually, in some ways it’s worse. For example, you ash out your window while you’re driving; sometimes you even toss your still-smoking butts into the road. You probably don’t know that just ashing out the window is an additional crime — for the very real reason that on occasion fires are started in just this way — but if you did, you wouldn’t care. Because apparently you think it’s all about your immediate gratification.
 
I know you’re resentful that your “right” to smoke has been encroached upon by the law. I know you were cheesed off when a year-and-a-half ago Long Beach banned smoking in all parks and recreation areas. Do I feel bad for you on that score? Sorry, but I don’t. You’ve got to remember that cigarette smoke is a pollutant, a carcinogen, and if people want to limit your contributing to air pollution in public places, I fail to see why we shouldn’t. I’m a strong advocate for civil liberties, but a behavior’s impingement upon another’s liberty is always cause to consider limiting it.
 
But you smoke in parks sometimes, and I’m not all that annoyed with you on that score. Or I wouldn’t be, if only you didn’t litter there and everywhere else you smoke. (Except in your backyard, not-so-oddly enough. Out there all your butts collect neatly in an ashtray.)
 
The truth is, rant as I might, I can’t stop you. And all the laws and regulations in the world can’t stop you, because it’s just too easy to continue on your course unabated. Yes, if the police see you littering they should bust your ass but good, but I imagine their rate of witnessing this type of societal disregard is somewhere in the one-in-a-million range.
 
So it’s up to you. And I ask that you take a moment to think about the practice, to really look at the logic behind it, to truly examine what it is you’re doing every time you flick that cancer stick away or crush it under your sole at leave it for someone else to clean up. Because I think that at core you’re probably a decent person misguided by your fellow smokers, who modeled this behavior for you all your life. And so I have to believe if you take a moment to consider your actions, you’ll make an effort to change them.
 
I, for one, would appreciate it.