Photo by Priscella Vega.
A cluster of brown and white paper bags illustrated with positive messages adorned Cal State Long Beach (CSULB)’s Maxson Plaza as part of Project Ocean’s Suicide Awareness Candlelight Vigil.
Students and faculty were encouraged to make luminary bags throughout the day, with the bags to eventually be displayed on the fountain’s ledge. Messages from those who lost friends or families to suicide showcased the power of speaking about a topic that is usually relegated to the shadows.
“You’re not alone.” “Life is beautiful.” Messages were simple but poignant. One student even dedicated their luminary to Nirvana’s front man Kurt Cobain, writing, “You were such a large inspiration to everyone.”
Women’s Resource Center coordinator, Pam Rayburn, began the ceremony by sharing her experience with her daughter, who was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder and later committed suicide at 23. Rayburn said her daughter had the energy of 10 people until her mental illness finally grasped both her energy and spirit.
“She dropped out of college and she used to tell me, ‘Mom, I used to be smart, but I’m not smart,'” Rayburn said. “That hurt me because I knew the mental illness had taken its toll on her life and she struggled for a long time—we struggled.”
Rayburn shared how she became involved as part of CSULB’s suicide prevention grant and how she was able to use her experience and voice to spread awareness to parents.
“I’d like to have parents know the information out there and know the warning signs,” Rayburn said. “To know where to go if their child somehow has come down with a mental illness or is maybe going through a crisis, to know whether they may be suicidal or not. I want staff and students to know the same because I don’t want anyone to fall through the cracks and not get help.”
With suicide ranking second as the leading cause of death among college students and roughly 18% of undergraduate students having reoccurring thoughts of attempting suicide, according to studies done by the Suicide Prevention Resource Center, Rayburn encouraged attendees to use their voice.
“I want you to know that no matter how small you think your voice is, you matter,” Rayburn said. “Together our voices matter because we can make a change and de-stigmatize mental illness and prevent suicide… You can help, you can heal and you can spread hope.”
Undergraduate OCEAN Peer Advocate Cristina Chavez lead the moment of silence and reflection as a form of showing compassion for victims of suicide.
Roughly 20 to 30 students and faculty attended the event. Many stopped by throughout the event to read through the luminaries. Tables for the Women’s Resource Center, Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS), Del Amo and others were set up outside for pamphlets on mental illness and to offer support.
The Candlelight Vigil is only one event of many scheduled as part of CSULB’s Living Well week.
Students are encouraged to reach out to CAPS if they are struggling with issues like relationships, family, stress with work or school. For further information, click here.