Every month has a defining holiday. November is Thanksgiving, December is Christmas, January is New Year’s, etc. But as many Proposition 3/17 petitions as I’ve signed, as much green beer as I’ve guzzled, even I know that March will never be St Patrick’s Day. No, March already has its holiday, its personality. And just as Columbus Day will never overtake Halloween for October’s affection, nothing will ever change the way we look at March. The 3rd month of the year will always be Madness, it will always be the NCAA, it will always be the quintessential American holiday. So that begs the question: just why do we love March so much?
The excess
If the tourney were set up like the NBA’s playoffs (every evening), or the NFL playoffs (just the weekends), it would never have succeeded like it has. Every sport is designed for primetime, designed for the viewing convenience of the public…except the NCAA tournament. It tips-off at 9am (PST) on a Thursday. It starts and stops. It has multiple things going at once, making it impossible to watch every minute of every game. Like the chick that ignores you, the NCAAs become just a little hotter by acting like they don’t even care about you. And so of course it all works in their favor; we don’t get to see every minute but instead we get slammed with four last-second finishes at once. We get inundated with games for four days solid then we get three days off to digest what we just saw. It’s the reason the Sweet Sixteen is more famous than the Elite Eight, we have days to think about teams that won their first two but we have barely two seconds to think about who won their 3rd game before their 4th tips-off. Back to that same chick that was ignoring you, when she finally asks you out you’re ready to ditch work for a week just to hang out with her. America loves an excuse to miss work.
The gambling
This is the elephant in the room for the mainstream media. This tournament is the gambling event of the season. This is the World Series of Sports Betting. This is where gambling reputations are made. So what if you predicted that the Saints would win it all; if you predicted Davidson coming out of nowhere, well then that was impressive. (Yes Mike, feel free to post a comment about how you had Davidson going to the Elite Eight, you earned it.) However, CBS can’t talk about the gambling aspect because America is dropping tens of billions on teenagers. (True story: DirecTV now has the March Madness package where you can watch every game; it was created because of Vegas complaints that CBS switched away from blowouts even though they were very close to the spread. In other words, we literally can watch every game only because there is so much money riding on Morgan State to stay within 18.) But obviously it’s not just point-spreads, it’s the brackets. Every single sports website has some Bracket contest. This tournament makes the Super Bowl seem penny-ante. This makes the Super Bowl look like Skeet Ulrich to the NCAA’s Johnny Deep. There will be more money bet these next few weeks than at any time the rest of the year. And there’s nothing wrong with that. Yes you’re betting on an 18-year old, but is it any worse than betting on a roll of the dice? America loves an excuse to gamble.
The Cinderellas
First, one quick note—is there any other time in sports when a team is compared to a Disney Princess? How did we all agree to check our masculinity at the door on this one? Would this ever be acceptable under any other circumstance—if a player is stiff and not moving well, would we ever say they’re like Barbie out there? Would we possibly compare Nate Robinson, Darren Sproles, or any other short athlete to a Bratz doll? What if a team is kind of struggling and they bring in a player that completely rejuvenates the team, would it be acceptable to call them a Snow White or Sleeping Beauty? Boy the Lakers said some day their prince will come and that Gasol trade has really been a dream come true… That would never, ever happen right? If a commentator said that he would be like a “Boom goes the dynamite” kind of internet sensation.
But anyway, in the NFL season it’s remarkable to see a 6-seed make it to the Super Bowl. Although they are really only the 11th or 12th best regular-season team; when George Mason made their run 3 years ago, they were an 11th seed, which means they were approximately the 40th best team in the country. The NCAA tournament is the only sport competition where there are actual underdogs. That said, the NCAA tourney is not nearly as unpredictable as we say. Last year all 4 one-seeds made it to the Final 8, the year before that all four made it to the Final Four, the year before that the Final Four were all one or two-seeds. In fact in 2008 the four most common picks in ESPN’s bracket challenge were UNC, Memphis, Kansas, and UCLA. So the most common picks turned out to be the correct ones. Of ESPN’s five biggest college basketball personalities, all five got at least two of the final four correct and two (Jay Billas and Andy Katz) both got it completely correct. Were any of those picks nearly as remote as the Cardinals making the Super Bowl? No, so why do we think the NCAA is more erratic than any other competition? America loves gentle unpredictably.
The Breakout-Stars
I remember when Syracuse made their run and won it all, and they were lead by Carmello Anthony. That same tourney Marquette was lead by a special guard named Dwayne Wade. Yes the days of Bird/Magic in the NCAAs are over but that doesn’t mean we don’t get to see the stars of tomorrow still in this tournament. There are more Joakim Noah and Tyler Hansboroughs now—great college players that will be mediocre NBA players at best; but that doesn’t change the fact that many NBA stars of tomorrow are in this tournament. Say what you want about the stupid NBA age rule, but it has let us enjoy more one-year wonders in the NCAA tourney. Kevin Durant on Texas, Derrick Rose on Memphis, Kevin Love on UCLA; these guys won’t have their college jerseys retired but their stock got to where it is in March. America loves a sneak-preview.
The reason we think of Memorial Day starting the summer and Labor Day ending it is because those are days that we take off. They’re little unexpected vacations. And we love that. We love surprises, and we love days off. And so we love March Madness. While every other sport is shouting for our attention, the NCAA is quietly batting her eyes and we have just melted for it. Four straight days of nonstop action? All the games streaming live online? Underdogs and last second upsets? It’s enough to make you want to take two days off of work. After all, America loves a holiday.