I learned today that Myrtle Beach is the world capitol of golf.  Well, that’s all fine and good, but did you know that it’s also the world capitol of MINIATURE GOLF?!  I thought not.  Yes, there are no less than fifty miniature golf courses in the city, with themes ranging from animal safaris to Gilligan’s Island.  The city apparently also hosts a national miniature golf championship tournament every year; I have no idea how that would work, but apparently it’s on ESPN2, so check your local listings.

My wife and I needed no time at all to decide that Jurassic Golf was the course for us, with its animatronic T-Rex, Dilophosaurus (with real spitting action), and Velociraptor.  There were also less animatronic Triceratops and Apatasaurs.  The game was a heated one: I jumped out to an early lead before my wife battled back to gain a small advantage after the first nine.  Then she bogeyed four straight holes, sending us into the 17th knotted at three over par.  I birdied the final two holes to steal a victory on the difficult Prehistoric Course, underneath the watchful eyes of the T-Rex, with a soundtrack of Velicoraptor shrieks as my victory song.  I danced a celebratory dance with all the joy and vigor I could muster, as the other elderly patrons looked on, confused.

But hey, it’s Myrtle Beach, the miniature golf capitol of the world.  What else could I have done?